- Chapter One -
The first thought in my fog-filled mind was, 'I'm the worst friend ever'. Then came, 'Oh my god' and 'I feel terrible'. As I woke with these thoughts, I popped my eyes open. I saw the blurry surroundings, a table, a chair, and something shattered across the familiar carpets... I remembered, then, why I was thinking such vile thoughts. I'd been recently hanging out with my best friend, Chad. And... well... I guess I'd revealed too much about my recent crushes. I guess... I-I guess that he liked me. It was really strange to think about, brilliant Chad liking me. I mean, the only reason I hadn't considered it was because I thought it was unreal, and totally silly. Not that I thought being together with him would've been silly... just the thought that he might actually CARE about me in that way. I felt like he was being sensitive - or was it ME? I couldn't tell, and it didn't matter because it was always ME being in the wrong about it. Then I realized, do I really like Jonathan Murray, or was it always Chad? Had I seen Chad reflected in those bright blue eyes, which was what both of them had in common...? Or was it truly Jonathan, with his brilliant smile and cute hair. Not to mention that strong, tall body and mind. Or... was it just Chad? With his gorgeous assets, his gorgeous personality... or his gorgeous HIM?
I shook the huge clod of thoughts out of my foggy mind and stood. There was an impression in the pillow-soft rug of where I'd been spread-eagled for hours on end, just laying there passed out. Why had I passed out? I don't drink, I never had had a single drop of alcohol onto the tip of my tongue. But, as I looked over to the glass on the carpets, it seemed to come together... I couldn't remember because I had drunk. And me and Chad had been chatting, then I brung out the beer. I drank at least three, because there were severals shards. Oh, god... I ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My face icky and pale, and my eyelids were faded purple underneath and were extra baggy.
The first thought in my fog-filled mind was, 'I'm the worst friend ever'. Then came, 'Oh my god' and 'I feel terrible'. As I woke with these thoughts, I popped my eyes open. I saw the blurry surroundings, a table, a chair, and something shattered across the familiar carpets... I remembered, then, why I was thinking such vile thoughts. I'd been recently hanging out with my best friend, Chad. And... well... I guess I'd revealed too much about my recent crushes. I guess... I-I guess that he liked me. It was really strange to think about, brilliant Chad liking me. I mean, the only reason I hadn't considered it was because I thought it was unreal, and totally silly. Not that I thought being together with him would've been silly... just the thought that he might actually CARE about me in that way. I felt like he was being sensitive - or was it ME? I couldn't tell, and it didn't matter because it was always ME being in the wrong about it. Then I realized, do I really like Jonathan Murray, or was it always Chad? Had I seen Chad reflected in those bright blue eyes, which was what both of them had in common...? Or was it truly Jonathan, with his brilliant smile and cute hair. Not to mention that strong, tall body and mind. Or... was it just Chad? With his gorgeous assets, his gorgeous personality... or his gorgeous HIM?
I shook the huge clod of thoughts out of my foggy mind and stood. There was an impression in the pillow-soft rug of where I'd been spread-eagled for hours on end, just laying there passed out. Why had I passed out? I don't drink, I never had had a single drop of alcohol onto the tip of my tongue. But, as I looked over to the glass on the carpets, it seemed to come together... I couldn't remember because I had drunk. And me and Chad had been chatting, then I brung out the beer. I drank at least three, because there were severals shards. Oh, god... I ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My face icky and pale, and my eyelids were faded purple underneath and were extra baggy.
